National Chocolate Cake Day

Happy National Chocolate Cake Day! Wait, you didn't know that it was a holiday? Well, to be honest, neither did I, until about 15 minutes ago. I figured since it's a trending topic on twitter at the moment, and since I'm waiting for a load of laundry to finish, I'd tell you, my reader(s), of the story of the chocolate inferno cake, or as my friend and at the time room mate called it, the diabetes cake.

Imagine this piece of cake, but 5 times  bigger, yeah, this thing was a  BEAST!

It was actually around this time last year that we encountered the beastly cake. I had recently just gone over to my parents house after work as I do every Sunday, mainly out of habit, and because they feed me. My dad had brought home cake samples from his work, one of which, was the chocolate inferno cake. This thing was huge, I mean, think of your average size cake, and stick 5 cakes on top of that, all chocolate. I took one look at that thing and knew there would be some sort of repercussions for even trying to eat something like that, but figured, it's food. So the cake and I made the long trek (all 6 blocks!)  back to my house where my roommate and I decided to test our mettle versus the chocolate giant. Just looking at this thing would cause any weaker man to tremble in fear, we were ready, with plates and forks in hand, we cut into the monster, we joked around that just by looking at this cake we'd lose a foot to diabetes, then the first bite came. I've never tasted anything so sweet, it was like eating a pound of sugar mixed in chocolate mixed in a bag of cocoa mixed with salt. I thought I was going to go into a coma, my friend didn't do much better, the cake was kicking our asses into the first bite. I got about halfway through my one piece and gave up. The cake had defeated me. I drank nearly a half gallon of milk just to get the piece I had down.  Travis made it through half the cake throughout the week, he was determined to defeat the monstrous pastry, but alas, neither of us could muster the will to finish the entire thing, the cake...had won.The day that thing went into the trash was a sad day, I'm pretty sure I heard "Taps" play off in the distance... The fact either of us survived that ordeal is amazing, especially the after effect of that thing, my poor bathroom has never been the same. So it is with a heavy heart that we remember the diabetes cake, as it serves as a reminder, too much of a good thing is never a good thing, and don't feed your roommates chocolate cake after midnight.

Semper Fudge.

Death, bucket lists, and does life really begin at 30?

Recently I attended a funeral for a family member I barely knew. During the service I listened to the pastor talk about him, telling stories of how he liked to fish, he was a generous person, and loved spending time with his kids and family. This got me to thinking, if I were to die tomorrow, what would people say about me? Let's see...

Jeff, he liked pro wrestling, and video games. He looked down at the ground a lot, wasn't very social, hated his job and spent most of his nights watching television with his 3 cats. Man, that guy loved his cats...

Newton and Figaro, you tell me you don't love these guys...

Newton and Gizmo, or as my girlfriend and I refer to them as, Newt Newt and the Momo cat. 

Needless to say, if I were to die tomorrow, I'd die knowing there was a TON of stuff I'd still like to do. At one point in time my list consisted of things that one would expect when you were younger, buying a house, buying my first car, etc. Well, been there done that: This is my top 30. Feel free to leave me comments about your lists, or what you think I should change/ add, or just comment for the sake of commenting. I'm so lonely...


1: Do 100 pushups without stopping, or becoming super winded. Right now I can get through about 20 before I feel like I'm going to pass out. I blame my lack of motivation and McDonalds for that. Damn you Big Mac!!!

2. Host or co-host a webcast: I've always thought it'd be cool to webcast playing a video game, or do a live wrestling commentary during a show (similar to live tweeting, but actually being on camera so people could see my real-time reactions).  Edit: I got to co-host Mash Tactics with King_Foom on 2 seperate occasions, and on 2/24/12 did my first test broadcast...that nobody watched...

3. Make at least 5 items from the Star Wars Cookbook: Simple enough, I'm actually surprised I haven't done this yet. I may need to have people over for this.

4. Get an article published on PWTorch or Wrestlezone: I've actually had an email published on Wrestlezone about Brian Knobbs shilling for 1-800-Ask Gary and had a comment published in an article about Bragging Rights when it was in Minneapolis, so I think that counts? Plus I had one of the writers tell me my email was one of the best ones he'd ever read, I'll let you guess who that was.

5.Visit Disney Land and World: self explanatory, another one I should have done a long time ago.

6.Donate Blood.

7.Get Married: Someday? Update: I got engaged over Christmas, I will be getting married in March! ^_^

8: Have kids: Do my cats count?

9. Go to a video game convention: Don't care if its PAX, E3...I'm not picky!

10. Go see the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame

11.Visit more than 10 of the 50 states. So far I've got MN (does it count if I live here?), WI, FL, AZ,UT,SD,TN, and WA out of the way. Although TN was just seeing the airport so I don't know if that counts.

12. Fly first class: I want to know if it's like the Fresh Prince tells me, will I get to drink OJ out of a champagne glass?

13. Buy a new car: By new I mean, new for that year, preferably something with power windows and locks. Oh, and a working dashboard would be epic! (My current car as much as I love it, has none of those things.)

14. Do a walk/run for cancer research or a fun run: Update: I'm doing Warrior Dash on June 29th. Leveling up my life 1 step at a time! ^_^

15. Take a community education class: Could be anything, it's always been more of trying to convince my job I need those nights off that has obstructed this goal, I'm thinking of taking guitar lessons, or karate, or I could learn auto repair...the choices...

16. Ride a mechanical bull: I don't think the mechanical penis at Sexworld counts, although I've never ridden it, nor do I plan to.

17. Visit Canada again: I'd like to see Calgary and Toronto. I've only been to Ear Falls,Ontario. Amazing place.

18. Visit the Philippines: Obvious reason, not going into this one.

19. Go to a wine tasting and visit a vineyard: I blame the movie Sideways for this, but it looks like it could be a lot of fun, and who doesn't like getting wasted on fermented fruit?

20. Visit Las Vegas: I could knock off like 5 things on that trip. This needs to happen. No "Hangover" type Vegas trip though, I'd like to remember what happens.

21. Meet someone famous: I've met guys from the MN Wild, MN Twins, and local newscasters, which I guess would count, but nobody people not from here would know.

22. Plant a tree: Just not in my yard, I've got 5 as it is, another one would not be needed.

23. Visit  famous landmarks: Mount Rushmore ,Grand Canyon, Hoover Dam, Space Needle  Rocky Mountains, CN Tower, Route 66

24. Swim in the ocean

25. Go on a road trip: I'm surprised I didn't do this in college, but then I did go to a tech school. Sigh...

26. Go Snowboarding

27. Learn how to ride a motorcycle and get my motorcycle license

28. Win something: Don't care what, I have terrible luck when it comes to these things.

29.  Grow a grizzly Adams style beard (Sorry, this one will probably never happen, my facial hair just won't grow!!!) Substitute, not shave for 6 months?

30. Meet KISS, sadly, my girlfriend has done this and I haven't. I'd even be happy meeting Peter Criss, and even Peter Criss doesn't want to meet Peter Criss.

That's it for now, hopefully I'll get back into writing more now that the holidays are over with. Until next time kids...